October 2009
4 posts
haven’t been on this shit in weeks.
about my second week right now living with Noel.
I just read that shit. fricken a. tearing up
words cannot fathom how furiated/upset/sad I am right now. I hella wanna audition for this one group err whatever that’s hella raw and are performing at this one thang. even though I’m not sure if I’ll make it in. at least to try it out, yeno? welps my mom won’t let me. I mean, I still can go to auditions this weekend cuhs they’ll be out. but that’s hella...
four point OHHHH
that’s right nigga. I just got less credit for makeup work. the one day I missed cuhs I left my house. got me hella mad. it’s coo though. why do I have a feeling Imma hella slip next quarter. welps just can’t be thinking that way or else I really will. just needa get all the fun outta me this week.. if that’s possible -__-
todayy visited grandpa. been hella long. ...
today was supercreez. especially compared to all of yesterday’s bullshiett. well I felt better by the end of the day, thanx(: soo school was fun as it always is. I was pretty tired though and fell asleep while they took a video of me -___- haha it was actually kind of cute. but I think I was tired from all that crying. it really wears me the fuck out though. hmm then took terminology...
September 2009
13 posts
hmm this weekend. I felt dumbass special for being invited to the baptism =*X soo went to that on saturday with fiance and son in oakland. I know right. been a while since I’ve been to church so it was nice. then thanga thang at eden shores. I drank hellllla ahahah jk well for me that’s a step up for not going crazy. umm dumbshit with my phone. got asked out, but I had a...
one kapamilya
successss. soo left the house at umm like ten ish then picked up niggas and whatnot. got lost like a muhfucker.. twice! aghh hella frustrating lol then finally got to pga. first ride was delirium where rj looked fucking hilarious cuhs she was scared shitless ahah then afterwards she looked like death lmaoo it was my first ride with vampire and.. fiance? lol then rode drop zone for my very...
“it’s not that I care. it’s just that I remember when I used to be...”
– buddy. pretty sure that’s true? hopefully
happy birthday Son!
love, Mom ahah. mm soo I broke my almost five weeks pill free on son’s birthday the other night. after practice then went straight to school without any fucking sleep and still somewhat on. hmm, but I’m pretty sure that I was being legit with what I said. I’m just shy. but I’m like hella feeling it now. I’m super happy. all I need now is to stay sober and get...
strike out my last post. stuuuuupid. well yada yada I don’t feel like typing what happened. I thought my hits were weak, but viet told me otherwise. I need a fucking backbone. I thought I was just being hella sensitive or having addictions. but there’s a fucking limit. I’m not putting myself through that kind of bullshit ever afuckingain. I swear, fucking homewrecker...
I am pissed the fuck off right now. UGHHHH I’m hella heated, like I’m getting hella hot right now. wtfffff I’m NOT gonna ehralsnfl;dkjfklasdjf;lj. shitfuck
happy birthday Ceryll(:
aka curious cunt. I couldn’t go with her to the thanga thang even though I wanted to. had practice for this dance thing Imma do at pga. I don’t really want to cuhs it’s dumbass corny, but I just wanna get in for free plus some experience would look good. hmm anyways ceryll’s house yesterday. I got pretty pissed but whatever. I didn’t even say shit so iunoo who...
A A A A.. A!
that’s right bitch, I got A’s on all fiiiive of my tests :D I had no idea we’d have a test yesterday. well no one knew. but I did pretty fucking good. I can’t believe I’m stupid enough to read the questions wrong -__- welps I did good on the ones I had today. missed zeroo. iunoo I’m hella happy right now. even though I studied like shit. I know the next...
ahah waoww that picture is hella old. I was hella ugly there GAHH.
last night, um never again ish. bitch was made a bigass mess. bestfriend too.
so like, I think I’m ready ish. to um yeah. I’m not completely sure yet. no rush right. but then again there’s ninex3
so like, I’m pretty sad right now with a some anger. I didn’t think my parents would be this way but I understand. it just sucks how I ruined their trust with people. welps today’s supposed to be fun so I’ll try to make the best of it, yeah.
superkuwawa =’(
btw, dime piece drop!!
:DD
guess who's bizzack
jk. back from leaving. it’s not running away. well the time I had off was fun cuhs I tried to have fun, but honestly I was constantly worried about my family back home. most importantly my mother. I took a vow last night that I’d never do anything to ever make my mom cry ever ever ever ever afuckinggain. even if she like makes me hella cry err iunoo gives me hella shit, I have a...
I’m sorry. but I thought you still wanted it? welps I’m hella thankful for you. hella sorry about the other night though. that day was horrible. that day I learned how spoiled I am ish. err like a brat kind of. I apologized and expected for forgiveness but I didn’t get any. I got kind of mad but caught myself.
well I left “home” yesterday. my mom contacted...
August 2009
13 posts
Happy Birthday Mommy(:
fucked up at bestfriend’s hot tub last night. don’t even know the last time I yakked that much. everywhere too &got him in trouble =T hella did not feel good. atleast I almost reached double digits. eight okae mm my mom’s birthday party was todayy. hmm iunoo what’s happening tonight. I thought I was gonna stay sober mm maybe laterrrr.
“what’s good with you besides your looks?”
– ahahahahah xD
happy birthday Koreaaaa(:
I LOVE YOU KAE!
fucking hot. I feel bad cuhs I don’t like walking? I was tired as shit today. my mom made me go with her this morning to do shit cuhs she doesn’t trust me at home alone -__- gayy could’ve gotten hella more sleep in. welps I didn’t even help clean that much. tomorrow’s my mom’s and sister’s birthday party here. I wonder how...
whyy
do you have to be hella sweet and dedicated to me and shit. makes me feel selfish and heartless. anyways, yeno how you said you’d change your personality and shit to be with me.. well fuck that. I don’t ever want you to change. just cuhs I think it’s silly and whatnot doesn’t mean you haveta change yourself. I’m trying to accept you and hopefully once we get to...
it goes like this;
well since like iuno I guess this week ish? I was like very very happy. hella gay. anyways I wasn’t trippin that it wouldn’t last long like I usually do. I thought about it a couple times and was like fuckit 1ife. hmm then today changed everything -__- fricken practice made me hella sad. just thinking about it makes me wanna fucking pop right now. wtf did I make the wrong...
umm thing we did in Tripping
Your view on yourself:
Other people find you very interesting, but you are really hiding your true self. Your friends love you because you are a good listener. They’ll probably still love you if you learn to be yourself with them.
The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love...
I just wanna know too.
waoww, so it’s been like a fucking week? perhaps I didn’t blog about last weekend I think it was when I had prolly the bestest funnest day &night. it was with umm the usuals plus john and marty. ohyeah and his friend silent library haha. wait then earl the girl and chance was there too. I was on like donkey kong. that was my last time though don’t trip stinky arm pit. ...
WHY THE FUCK
does this kind of bullshit dilemma whatever it’s called alwayssss happens to me. I hate hurting people, especially the people that care about me the most. the person. I really don’t want to but I gotta do what I want. it’s the last thing I ever want to do. again. holy shit hella promises I just gotta fucking break. to either person. FUCK THIS. I hate how it’s...
getting addicted to comfort again. I’m confuzzled as hell =T
idk if I should go back to work or not UGHHHH my mom’s coming home today I think and I’m getting yoshi back tomorrow.
fuck my motherfucking life.
omg’d two last night and I have a fever now. my stoges are wasted =( no sleep at all. my mom’s coming home tomorrow I think and I hope. I am dumbass confused about how I feel. and I’m trippin out about next week? ish.
I am just confused as fuck. that’s what’s bothering me the most.
bad news bears
I miss my mom. I hope you get better faasssst cuhs I do not like my dad. I love you love you love you kae. been hella sad &whatnot fml.
work is a fucking bitch. up at nine, home at eleven. my feet hurt like a bitch and my calves are sore as fuck. now I’m sick. yessss. oh welps not working today and tomorrow to take care of mi madre. iuno about the weekend. I wanna quit. ...
Korea: Planner, what are we doing today?
ahahaha made my fucking day.
been a minute.
start work tomorrow. excited ish but I’m tired already thinking about it. no sleeeep ughh I almost cried. oh welps I’m waiting on the 14th taking it off cuhs baby and my other baby haha will be back. hitting up the beach with R.A.N.A. ahahah funnel cakes! just tryna win the trip to Vegas and I keep thinking about that first paycheck. fuck Ohlone I don’t think...
July 2009
10 posts
bruises everyfuckingwhere. I’m heavyweight now lmaoo
soo 14th babe’s coming back. yesssss
um kae piece.
happy birthday Papang(:
I’m surprised but not really. last last night was number one but I liked it even though it was bad. and last night was weirddddd. I don’t fucking know what it means. scary ass nightmare last night, maybe it explained things. but fuck I forgot it cuhs I hella slept in today. I’m getting more sleep though =) yayy tomorrow’s tuesday.
I feel bad. ohwelps I quit...
itzzzTomTom: no more depressed jhongjhong k?
happy but still not sure
yesterdayy or whatever slept over Cutie’s with Korea. random then bitchass.. then it was fun and another sleepover here. hella cheeeel and I felt bad. I don’t like having guests here. hmm but oh welps. then today I was actually the sober one while they were rollinnnn. went to great mall and whatnot. actually had a good time and was happy. fuck pills(:
Imyalreadybitch.
bye tomtom =(
monday/tuesday was fucking crazyy. halfmoon for tomtom’s last day. picked up duckie then was hella on. freezing cold at the beach I felt hella dumb with my bikini and shorts. soo went back to duckie’s and drank. didn’t reach my goal of double digits cuhs I was getting to crazy. can’t believe I didn’t throw up, even after I tried to. HAHA yess. pulled an all...
yesterday was fucking crazy. visited duckie then headed back with him. we omg ___ed. goodshit I still have some. hopefully I can go tomorrow. all my bestfriends leaving me gahh fuck you
cutting down and then some. I knoww
I already knew this would happen. I don’t know if it’s my negative attitude, or the fact that I have my guard up and just watching out for myself. well whatever it is, there’s something wrong with me that not even bestfriend knows. shiiiiit. another one bites the fucking dust right. oh welps goldiggaaaaa hahaha
mm niggas came over. tried piercing tomtom’s lip lmaoo...
borat is fucking gross. hella fell asleep and on ice age too. first time eating Black people food. pretty fucking good
hella people wanna do shit this week omfg I hate how I always need an excuse to leave FML
therese’s cotty yesterday. fucked up so badly.
last night was fun.
pmr, I’ll do the same.
yes, bitch
waoww
June 2009
9 posts
had a good run today with big bro. hella outta nowhere and hella early. weird how my vision got blurry and shit. I actually got kind of scared. I didn’t expect a talk but we did. it was good and he helped me realize a clear addiction that I had no idea about. so now I’m hella just confused. but it’s not even like I decide what happens, just gotta feel it out. and I told...
weirdass dreams for three nights in a row now. they all have to do with an old flame that’s different each time. think I kind of get it.
tomorrow? nope
car :D
thinking of a name..
Happy Papa's dayy
first time clubbing a few days ago. abyss with ceryll and earl and goose. almost got caught, fuck thaaaat. chance’s grad bbq yesterday. pretty fun but iunoo. first day looking for a car today. I like the sanleandro honda 0_o found like one goodass deal but gotta keep looking tomorrow.
hmm last night was weird. the night before I actually tried to settle differences. but it seems...
weeeeeirdass dream. I liked it though =X I don’t like be a.l. thursday though hurry up. hella mad that the classes I want for ohlone are fucking full. pissed off like you have no idea. it doesn’t help me blaming someone though. cuhs I agreed to stop doing that and take responsibility for my own actions. well idk what to do now. semester off? stressing. about my family too. ...
congrats c/o '09
grad day started off horrible. pissed off plus the rain effing up my hair. then went to dexter’s grad party to meet his whole family for the first time. hella awkard and shit. then turned out my mom got my stuff I hella like. feel bad for not thinking she cared. felt hella guilty actually. but I’m so fucking relieved. that now both my parents know about my piercing, all grad...
fuck. my liiiiife
this week was nice, spent about all of it with Papa. chillin at my house, cooking for each other, watched The Spirit, tried to play tennis, worked out, went to malls, ate at The Counter, and hella other shit. ohyeah and stinkybutt got his camera. yayy? weekend was blehh had to stay at the zoo. whatever, senior check out tomorrow. I kind of have hella stuff to do tomorrow. and this week but...
waow, I really don’t fucking care. I don’t even associate with them. I’m not missing out on a fucking thing cuhs I got my ownnnn.
saturday was superfun except in the end. went to cityy with Papa as we got my lip pierced. hurt for like a second. then went shopping and got my share of the dime piece summer line ;] mad sexy. um after spending all of his cash we headed home where no one would fucking pick us up. omfg 2 dollar bill.. but it was really fun overall. I’m not satisfied yet though. need another trip...